For Better Health: Don't "Diet"

Do you have any friends on a diet? Hahahahaha! ROTFLMAO!

Stupid question, eh? I can name at least a dozen friends on a diet at any one point in time. It’s an American pastime. And the font of big bucks for diet creators.

Oh, and the creativity of the diet creators! Who wouldn’t want to do the South Beach Diet (impying images of beach-body-beautiful), or the Mediterranean Diet (sunny beaches, laid back life style, perfect weather), or even the unnamed lose-100-pounds-in-one-hour diets?

Why am I against the plethora of “diets”? Perhaps it is because I consider myself fat if I have to upsize to Size 2. (No, that’s for SURE not it!) Or perhaps it is because I own major stock in a bacon factory. (Would that I had the kind of cash I could play stock market roulette.) Or maybe it’s because I have so many friends who are perpetually dieting because as soon as they go off the diet-du-jour, they gain the weight back.

Have you ever looked up the word “diet”? See, I’m an etymology kind of guy--love, love, love words and their origins, connotations and denotations, you get the idea. So diet is very interesting. This is from Dictionary.com:

1175–1225;  (noun) Middle English diete  < Anglo-French, Old French  < Latin diaeta  < Greek díaita  way of living, diet, equivalent to dia- dia-  + -aita  (akin to aîsa  share, lot); (v.) Middle English dieten  (transitive) < Anglo-French, Old French dieter,  derivative of the noun

Get it? Diet isn’t a short-term shock to your system; it’s a way of life.

Sure, you might lose pounds, even a lot of pounds with the extreme diets. But the research is pretty compelling that most people gain it back and pack on more pounds. Net gain: negative numbers long-term.

A dear neighbor was talking about his latest diet: 600 calories a day. That is dangerous, and I didn’t hold back on my concerns. But even very smart people  seem willing to take the risks they know lurk in such diets in pursuit of the elusive perfect body--or at least not as grossly over-weight.

I am in need of losing more than a few pounds, and after a medical crisis this spring, I decided to finally, really, seriously take charge of my health. No more sporadic exercise; that was one reason I was in the trouble I was in. No more yo-yo dieting or saying I was going to lose weight; that was another reason I was in the trouble I was in.

No, this time I was going to diet, in the etymological sense of the word. This would be my life-style eating plan, my forever-eating plan. I’ve lost 25 pounds in 6 months. I say 25 pounds in that time, but in reality it was shorter; I’ve maintained that weight loss rather than losing more because I broke my arm and couldn’t exercise. At least I maintained. Now that I am healing, I am going to get back to exercise, so I expect to take of the pounds I still have to lose.

I have to preface my diet “secrets” with this disclaimer. We already ate pretty healthfully--whole grains, 1% milk, olive oil and other healthful fats, lots of fruits and veggies, more chicken and fish than beef--you get the idea.

So my diet, my life-style plan revolves around regular exercise, portion-control, and smart food choices. That’s it. I don’t count calories or weigh food. If someone invites me to a birthday party, I’m going to eat the cake. I won’t beat myself up over it, but I won’t eat birthday cake every day. And I won’t pick up the biggest piece on the table.

I’m into simplifying. I can do this the rest of my life. It’s not a gimmick, not a quick-loss plan, but my goal is not the immediate number on the scale. I want to live a quality life for as long as I am given breath. I want a diet--a way of living. I don’t want to be searching for the next weight loss miracle.

A Recipe for a Book--Strong Secondary Characters

I was reading posts in the “Girly Book Blog Hop” (34 of them!!!) sponsored by a member of the FaceBook group, Chick Lit Goddesses. The blog hop ended yesterday, but I’m sure you could pick them up still.

The theme was secondary characters in each blogger’s books. It made me re-think my own stories and how I have portrayed secondary characters.

Because, well, you do know I’m a writer, don’t you?

“Parsley, Sage, and Rosemary Time” is a blatant attempt at self-promotion. I lure you in with recipes, cooking tips, and gadget reviews, but it is all to serve one master: my culinary mystery series. Well, that, and I do truly like recipes, cooking tips, and gadgets.

The first book in the as-yet-unpublished series, Mission Impastable, sees Alli, my heroine, and Gina, her BFF, trying, unsuccessfully, to name their start-up personal chef business.  Later in the scene, my fave secondary character, Maria, Gina’s mom, enters. Listen in:

Given her “Luscious Mango” hair color, Alli laid what should have been a freckled cheek, but wasn't, on the top of the old oak table in Gina's kitchen. She closed her eyes.

Gina sat down across from Alli. She picked up her paper towel and swiped at a syrup puddle one of the kids had left behind for her to find with a silk blouse sleeve at some inopportune moment. She tossed the crumpled bit to the table. Gina’s eyes looked stricken. She bowed her head. She ran her hands through the sides and to the back of her blond-streaked hair.

"How about 'Meals in Minutes'", she looked over at Alli whose head remained on the table.

"Or 'What's Cooking?'" Still no response from Alli.

"Maybe we could call it 'What's for Dinner?'" Gina asked with a question mark in her voice.

"Nah," Alli mumbled from her tabletop nest. "Somebody got that one with meals people drive in and pick up over by the Black Canyon Freeway." Alli's flat voice signaled a lack of her normal ebullience. Her head bobbed up.

 "How about using our last names? 'Smithson and Wesson-food you'd kill for'? No, huh?"

Alli thought again, furrowing her brow and kinking more curls. "I know! I know! Unique! Ear-catching! Let's call it "Al-Gi Dinners'! Get it? Alli and Gina. . . Al-Gi!"

"Tell me that's your sick idea of a joke!" Gina frowned back at her best friend since second grade. Alli's cheek went back onto the table where she spied a stray cheesecake crumb--mmmm! blueberry, her favorite. Her finger darted out to capture it for release on her tongue.

Silence reigned, but a change in the air current signaled someone else had entered the kitchen. "'Dinner is Served'," Gina's mom announced, waddling over to the table, her pink, orange, and purple floral housecoat flapping limply in her considerable wake.

"Ma," Gina gave "the look" to Alli before further addressing her mother, "Ma, it’s breakfast time. Since when have you lost track of your meals?"

"No, Genius! That's what you should call this personal chef thing, which I personally think is a wastrel of your time, since any good mother would not want a stranger cooking for her family if she had any self-pride at all and who will pay you enough to feed your own children which makes you wonder who will be cooking for them while you're out feeding the world, that would be me."

Maria Martini paused for breath, "Call your business, 'Dinner is Served'."

Alli's head popped up. "I like it," Alli smiled. "Classy. Specific. Easy to remember. 'Dinner is Served' Yeah, I like it!"

"Oh, Ma! That is perfect! How did you come up with it?" Gina asked, dark brown eyes snapping in her re-animated face.

Maria gave a smile that could have been smug or a snarl. "That's what I thought of the first time you two twits thought you wanted to start a cooking business even though you didn't ask me what I thought probably because you knew I'd try to talk some sensical into you because why would someone cook for other people in their kitchens when you don't even know if they have a can opener since people who don't like to cook probably don't even own a can opener, not that you open a lot of cans.”

Gina and Alli stared at Maria. They knew she was going to start up again, and to interrupt her now would extend her explanation even further. Better to let her finish.

“But that's the name I thought of two weeks ago." Maria smiled, her lips twisted in what passed on her face for a sweet smile.

"Two weeks ago," Gina repeated flatly. "And you couldn't be bothered to tell us until now?"

"When I heard my sweet Alli say," Maria paused to pat Alli's cheek, "Al-Gi Dinners', I couldn't keep it to myself any longer because why would you have listened sooner when people need to hit the dirt on the bottom first."

She sat happy-faced, clearly relishing the look of the two of them sitting gape-mouthed. It wasn't always easy following her logic or her language, but, more often than either of them would like to admit, Gina’s mother made her convoluted points.

“You fill in the name on the forms in this pile,” Alli tapped the larger stack. “I’ll go register the name for a website.” Alli darted off to the office they shared in Gina's house, enumerating her "to-do" list aloud. "I'll be back in an hour or so," she yelled over her shoulder.

            Maria settled herself at the table with a mug of Alli’s strong and hot coffee. "My Alli," Maria’s smile reflected her pride. "Isn't she just something? She plays that computer like a deck of cards. Why don't you learn to do the computer things she does?"

            Gina felt the familiar rise of jealousy whenever her mother praised Alli’s attributes over her own. "Why should I? Alli can do that part, or even the kids if it comes to that. I save myself for the other stuff," Gina replied a little defensively.

Maria is in part modeled after my mom, the first language-mangler I knew. Mother takes “Ibufferin” when she gets “flusterated”. Maria was easy to write. I like her as a secondary character because she has a unique relationship with Alli that goes back a long time, and she can tell Alli when she needs to shape up. Most people in my critique groups like Maria, but some think I overdo her language-mangling. What do you think? Comment below. Would her language patterns drive you nuts or do you find them endearing?

Going to the Dogs

There’s a cute famiy story--well, Chicago doesn’t think it’s cute--but everyone else laughs heartily when the tale is told.

Chicago was in elementary school and our dog-du-jour was Tasha. I’m a cooker--have I mentioned that?--and I was experimenting with a dog cookie recipe. I didn’t like all the unnatural ingredients in the store-bought ones, they were expensive, and the fat content was astronomical. So, I thought, how hard can it be.

But, I digress.

Chicago came home from school and spied the dog cookies cooling on the counter. “Oh, goodie,” he said. “Cookies!” or words to that effect. “Can I have one?”

“Sure,” I said. (I know; it should have been “Surely”, but it wasn’t. Okay?)

“Chocolate chip?” he asked as he reached over for the biggest one.

“Nope,” I replied honestly.

He bit into it and grimaced before rushing to the sink to spit it out.

“Hey!” I yelled. “Give me the rest of that.” I bent down and let Tasha take it from my hand.

“You fed me dog cookies?” The disbelief in his voice was comical.

“To be accurate, you grabbed one from the rack. It’s on you. There’s nothing wrong with them except they didn’t meet your expectations.” I mean really, there was nothing in those cookies to hurt him. So they weren’t sweet! The only thing in those cookies that I hadn’t fed him before was a can of chopped meat dog food. You see my point?

Nevertheless, he still to this day holds a grudge.

Back to the dog cookies. Over the years and dogs, I have perfected my dog cookie recipe. Current beneficiary, Maudie, drools, reallllly drools when I am baking them for her.

When we were foster parents for the Desert Labrador Retriever Rescue group, I gave a package of the cookies and the recipe to whomever we turned the dog over to. And now, just for you, I am sharing a treat your pup will love. Promise!

Tasha and Pooh Bear Moore’s Dog Cookies

5 c. Bisquick, HeartSmart

5 c. whole wheat flour

1 c. wheat germ

6 T. garlic powder

1 qt. beef broth

1 egg

½ c. molasses

22 oz. can chopped meat canned dog food.

Mix dry ingredients well. Blend in broth. Add egg, molasses, and dog food. Mix well. Drop by tablespoons on Pam-sprayed cookie sheet. Bake at 450° until browned (~ 10-12 minutes). Makes 10 dozen cookies. Freeze most of them. Put enough for the week in a Ziploc bag in the refrigerator for treats.

Yonanas: My New Favorite Kitchen Gadget

If you’ve been reading me, you know I love, love, love kitchen gadgets. I mean, really, what’s not to love? Toys for grown-ups, or at least who look like grown-ups.

Well, you have to go buy this one. I mean it. It’s for your health. I’m thinking of writing it off on my taxes (Only kidding, Mr. IRS Man!). Even if not tax deductible, it’s worth the purchase price (which ain’t cheap, but not unaffordable).

This woman, Eileen McHale created Yonanas as an alternative to ice cream. You freeze overly ripe bananas (I know, you like to make banana bread, but how many loaves can one family eat???) rock solid hard. Freeze other fruits, too. The first one I made was Strawberry-Blueberry Yonanas. I shoved one frozen banana down its little throat, added a cup of frozen mixed strawberries and blueberries, another banana and presto! there’s this soft serve mix in my bowl. I stirred the concoction to thoroughly blend the fruits and then served a guest and me.

Did it taste like bananas, you ask? Nope. It tasted like soft serve, creamy, strawberry-blueberry ice cream. Honest! And clean-up was easier than my blender!

Last night, I served DH a concoction that WAS NOT low cal, but he loved it. I used three frozen bananas, 2 tablespoons of Nutella, 2 tablespoons of mini chocolate chips, 2 tablespoons of caramel ice cream topping, and 2 tablespoons of pecans.

I shoved the bananas down the little guy’s throat and it poured into a bowl containing the Nutella and chocolate chips. I blended it thoroughly, divided it into two ramekins, topped them with caramel and pecans, and watched DH lick his bowl. Really! Even with my added stuff, it still came in with a count lower than if I had used vanilla ice cream or even frozen yogurt.

I wouldn’t steer you wrong. Do buy this or put it on your list for some gift-buying occasion. Lil’ Bro is getting one for a wedding present. Safe to reveal here since he never reads my blogs.

Here’s a link to see what it’s like, then buy it! Seriously!

http://amzn.to/SPFdZ4

In Praise of Vinegar

It’s been a long, long, long time. My health took a nosedive this spring, and it has really slowed down my productivity in writing, blogging, tweeting, and Facebooking.  But, I’m baaack!

First an update: My alter ego, Angelica French, writes steamy romances. She started a new blog, Romance Righter. Check out weird sex laws and weird sex facts at http://bit.ly/TCN5Co

I have four manuscripts out right now to publishers/agents hoping for a hit!

For today’s blog post I wanted to tout one of my favorite things (yet again). White and apple vinegar! Buy it by the gallon. It is cheap, cheap, cheap and the uses you put it to will save you $$$.

Here is an article elaborating 20 uses for vinegar. http://yhoo.it/qbWfMX  Check it out for more detail. The article says you can use vinegar to:

         Condition your hair

         Kill weeds

         Remove underarm clothing stains

         Soften fabrics

         Remedy sore throats

         Deter ants

         Soak sore muscles

         Freshen air

         Remove stickers

         Cure hiccups

         Clean crusty paint brushes

         Dissolve rust

         Eliminate stale odors

         Remove mineral deposits

         Neutralize spice in foods

         Prolong life of cut flowers

         Clean glass, plastic, chrome, and floors

         Treat fungal infections

         Tenderize and kill bacteria in meat

         Open drains and freshen garbage disposals

It is time for me to take some vinegar to my wine glasses (#17). Our hard water here really builds up. I soak a paper towel with white vingegar, swirl it over the hard water spots, and rinse. They are beautiful to behold!

I also cook with vinegar. (Don’t we all???)

Pattycake gave me this recipe decades ago, and it remains a family favorite snack. Not beautiful to look at, but your tummy will love them!

Black Bottom Cupcakes (makes ~18)

Filling:                                             Cupcakes:

8 oz. cream cheese                           1 ½ c flour

1 egg                                                1 c sugar

1/3 c sugar                                       1/3 c cocoa

1/8 t salt                                           1 t soda

1 c (6 oz) chocolate chips                ½ t salt

                                                        1 c water

                                                        1/3 c oil

                                                        1 T white vinegar

                                                        1 t vanilla

Combine cream cheese, egg, sugar and salt. Beat until smooth. Stir in chocolate chips. Set aside.

Sift together flour, sugar, cocoa, soda, and salt.  Add water, oil, vinegar, and vanilla. Beat well. Fill muffin tins lined with paper baking cups 1/3-1/2 full of chocolate batter. Top with heaping teaspoon of cream cheese mixture.  

Bake at 350° for 30-35 minutes.

        

Another way to use vinegar is in vinaigrettes. Simple to make, but if you need to buy some, keep some on hand, here are the best:

Top balsamic vinaigrettes    http://yhoo.it/owy6ny

If you’re not already a vinegar afficianado, now is the time to get the habit! Tart dreams!

Hand-Crafted Liqueurs

Making liquor goes way back, I mean, waaaay back, like before-biblical back. Something there is that loves a fermented beverage. One can see how The Early Ones™ thought this was the greatest thing since, well, not sliced bread, that came later, but a really great invention. You feel good, you sorta get loose with your buds, maybe you approach the gal with the long hair that got burned in the cooking fire so she has an exotic look.

No doubt Holy People of The Early Ones™ tried to control access to such beverages for lots of reasons--they wanted the buzz, they wanted to control who had the delusions and visions, and/or they didn’t want others to have fun.

But, as good things will do, secrets to how to brew alcohol became widely known. I am dropping notes into a tickle file” on a book about The Early Ones that I will write someday. Alcohol will play a role.

But we are the Now Ones. Unless you live in certain areas of Extreme Liquor Management, alcohol is pretty readily available across the world. Now Ones can buy beer and wine making kits on the Internet and start a home brewery for $100-$200. Additionally, microbrewery and boutique breweries and wineries provide real options in liquors that have been crafted for millennia.

Chicago, our youngest son, worked in various areas of wine production and sales over the years. He has done it all from hauling rocks and killing snakes so he can plant vines to stocking liquor store shelves to selling bottles of fine wine in a tasting room. Let me tell you how weird it is to hear your child talk wine-speak, a language you barely understand.

But, I digress.

I am not going to deal with beer and wine kits and directions and aging and stuff like that. Nope. Liqueurs! That’s where we are today.

One year for Christmas I made liqueurs to to give friends and relatives (who were drinkers--I did not give this gift to my Mormon sister). Unfortunately, there were not a great success. They just didn’t taste like the real deal--because, of course, they were not the real deal. They were cheap knockoffs, and they tasted like it.

DH, trying to save money on how fast we drain liqueurs for our nightly take-the-rough-edges-off sipper, bought an alternative to the Bailey’s Irish Cream I am fond of. I got it down over the course of several nights, but I didn’t request more. I never whined, but when asked, I told DH that at this point in my life I was worth a few more bucks to him and he should cough up the cash. He did, bless his heart.

Some of you may sip these, but I recommend you put them in coffee or tea or over ice cream or mixed with pudding or to flavor pound cake or . . . Are you seeing a pattern here? Bury the flavor in something else. Got it? With that caveat, try these recipes:

MYO Kahlula: Boil 12c stng joe+2# brn sug. Cool. Add 4-6T van+1 btl Everclear.

MYO Kahlua: Boil 1qt h2o+2.5c sug+3T instant espresso. Simmer 3 hrs. Cool. Add 1T van+2.5 c vodka.

Oh, yeah, I forgot to mention how much I love “tweating” recipes. You get a word puzzle and a recipe. Cool, huh?

So, the recipes I provided here are good for what they are; but if you want to sip an after dinner drink, buy the real deal. You’re worth the few extra bucks.

The Cooking Life: How It All Began

Back to my normal schedule. Whew! Posting every day for a month was challenging. Until I do another “Month of . . .” series, I’ll be posting foodie stuff and recipes 2-3 times a week.

Speaking of the next “Month of . . .” series, what would you like to see me tackle? Desserts? Appetizers? Chicken dishes? Casseroles? Pastas? (Mission Impastable is the first book in my culinary mystery series.)

Make suggestions in the comments section and I might name a dish after you if you chime in. I’m kind of leaning toward those little mini desserts as a possibility. DH loves them, and so do friends. But, the gate is open on options. Let me know what you want. I will plan on a new “Month of . . .” every 3 or 4 months.

For today, I am feeling nostalgic. I had some early influences on my cooking interests. Big Mama cooked the way she had learned in the Appalachian mountains. That meant if it wasn’t fried in lard or had lard added to the veggies for flavoring, it wasn’t cooked.

The occasional salad was iceberg lettuce and Italian dressing. If it was summer, we added in carrots and tomatoes from the garden. If not, well . . . I cook nothing like that, and I haven’t since I left home for college. I do wonder why sometimes. It seems I was more influenced by some outside sources, though I am hard-pressed to identify them, than by years at Big Mama’s side. Odd.

One of my earliest cooking memories was when I was about 4. I was standing on a wooden chair pulled in front of the gas stove. I was stirring scrambled eggs. Why that memory? Who knows, but I see it clearly in that little galley kitchen that was my first home.

When I was about 12, my favorite aunt gave me a spice rack with 12 spices for Christmas. Wow! I was thrilled. Clearly I had been either expressing an interest in expanding my cooking or I was doing some experimentation. Why else give me that? My mother watched me open the box and turned to my aunt with an expression of dismay. “What have you done?” she asked. I’m not sure how soon it was before she forgave her.

Up until my spice rack (with exotic spices like basil and tarragon), I used the spices Big Mama provided--salt, pepper, or cinnamon. After the gift, I added spices to everything I cooked. And because we were really poor and could not afford to discard food uneaten, we ate it no matter how awful. It really was terrible sometimes.

I continued exploring spices and how to combine them. I either developed my taste-o-meter or tuned in to it during those years. To this day, some of my favorite reading is cookbooks and recipes. It’s as if I can taste what the recipe is describing with that taste bud in my head.

I thought everybody had a taste bud in their heads until some friends gave me very odd looks. So now I only share that with you. Keep it to yourself, okay?

Comment below if you, too, have a taste bud in your head and if you use your taste-o-meter to gauge how to develop a new recipe. There are not enough of us out there. Oh, and don’t forget to suggest a new month-of series.